Monday, September 9, 2013

Machine Head frontman makes top 10 list about Avenged Sevenfold

After Avenged Sevenfold put out their new album "Hail To The King" the talk has turned in the rock community to the fact that the record at points rip off bands like Metallica, Guns N' Roses, and Megadeth. Then again hasn't that always been the talk about Avenged Sevenfold? It's actually one of the reasons I enjoy them so much. At any rate Machine Head frontman Robert Flynn has put out a top ten list of jokes regarding the county's number one album. Here is his original post:



Congratulations to Avenged Sevenfold on their latest "covers album" coming in at #1, who knew that re-recording Metallica, Guns N Roses, and Megadeth songs could be such a worldwide hit!!?? Ba-dap Psssssss!!

I'm on fire!!

In case you've been living under a rock, Avenged came in at #1 in multiple countries throughout the world. I'm happy for them. Good band. And while I like the new record, and really dug the last record "Nightmare", hopefully we're all coming down from our post-orgasmic #1-album-bliss, because it's time to call a spade a spade!! It's time to poke a little fun at A7X, cause there's some blatant jackery goin' on there wiggas!!

So here are my top 10 jokes about the new Avenged Sevenfold record:

10) Avenged Sevenfold - "Now with even MORE Metallica"

9) Avenged Sevenfold to change name to "Sad But Two"

Number of "spurting penises" drawn on Avenged logos suddenly skyrockets

7) Eyeliner sales skyrocket as thousands of heartbroken goth girls realize "Hail To The King" is actually "that ugly AC/DC bands song 'Thunderstruck'"

6) After hearing "Heretic", Dave Mustaine flips out, blames Obama, Metallica and UFO's for the A7X stealing "Symphony Of Destruction".

5) After seeing how much success the band Bush had stealing other band names for song titles, A7X decided to steal "In Flames" for latest chorus. Future chorus lyrics include "Tr-vi-um" and "Kill-switch En-gage"

4) Upon hearing latest album, Lars Ulrich goes all gangsta, breaks bottle of Dom Perignon on M. Shadows head, while his 11ft girlfriend put Shadows in headlock, as he screams in Shadows face, "You're gonna rip off St. Anger next right, HUH? You're gonna rip off St Anger NEXT RIGHT? HUH, HUH, HUH!!"

3) "Black album" sales skyrocket as fans realise where new songs came from.

2) After hearing Avenged's Guns N Roses cover "Doing Time", Axl actually calls Slash, says, "Dude, What The Fuck?!"

1) And the #1 joke about the new Avenged Sevenfold album: Avenged Sevenfold release statement that they're NOT ripping off Metallica, announce side project with Lou Reed.


Subscribe to The General Journals: Diary Of A Frontman... And Other Ramblings

Visit The General Journals archive:

1 comment:

  1. I am a fan of both bands. I have already commented on loudwire, yes the songs sound like Metallica GNR Megadeth etc. I also love making fun of my favorite bands ( Hey thanks to you cutter I got to tell drummer joke with Lars Ulrich) If I was M Shadows, he would simple reply with the following " Thanks Mike for the congrats on our SECOND straight #1 record. Where is yours? BTW, careful. You are standing is a VERY large glass house Cheers! Let's tour together!"

    And they tour, it's amazing and all is well.